I celebrated two Passover seders on two consequtive nights, as is customary in the Diaspora, at one of the Chabad Houses in the new place. This has a symbolic meaning for me as the communal celebration of my "exile" with no clear end in sight so far.
Exactly 30 years ago I went into exile and it took me about ten years to get out of it. But unlike last time I don't see this as real exile as I left Israel this time with one important personal task and one clear public mission. I may participate in this communal celebration before I leave this country for a certain place where I've been thinking of spending the last chapter of this life of mine, which is not Jerusalem.
In the meanwhile I've been trying my best to live the present moment here. Because of the nature of my personal task and public mission my contact with other people is minimal, and I don't have a chance to spend time with such a huge group of people as in a communal Passover seder.
Spending time with 50-200 people at the same table for three communal meals gave me a unique chance to observe and experience anew how the individual ego and collective ego manifest themselves in the majority of people regardless of their cultural background.
As I expected, almost everybody I met there labeled me, the other people and themselves, thus confusing our essence with our bodies or our life stories. I still feel tired of this every time I encounter it, but I have no other expectation any more, which is a progress on my part. And after all this manifestation of the individual ego doesn't pose any immediate threat to anyone.
But one manifestation of the collective ego which I expected to encounter and I did encounter this time was a warning against one extremely dangerous thought and action. I verbally protested directly to one supporter of this dangerous ideology and received his very aggressive emotional counterreaction, which surprised not only me but also the whole community. The bigger problem is that he is not exceptional in the social collective with which he identifies himself.
From these two manifestations of the ego in a group of people I've realized once and for all that a common or similar state of individual consciousness is far more important to me that belonging to the same social collective when I decide with whom to remain in close contact.