Empaths are often the bearers of light in a family. As you awaken to your sensitivities and heal, you may find that you're the one chosen to break generational family patterns of dysfunction or abuse. Part of being an empowered empath is building your confidence and self-esteem. You learn to set boundaries when someone treats you disrespectfully. By saying no to family members or others who don't support your sensitivities or highest self, you are helping to stop ongoing negative patterns.
In Buddhism, karma is the destiny you earn through actions and behaviors. What you give is what you get. Though you may not have consciously volunteered to change your family's karma, it only takes one courageous person in a lineage to stop repeating harmful patterns. This monumental decision will benefit your life and also the lives of generations to come.
- Judith Orloff (Thriving as an Empath: 365 Days of Self-Care for Sensitive People, March 18)
When I reached this daily portion in my daily reading of this book, I felt as if the author were talking about me (and to me) and realized so clearly why I had never wanted to have my own children even by paying a very heavy price for this refusal - I wanted unconsciously to stop passing harmful patterns I had "inherited" from both paternal and maternal sides. Even though I'm conscious of this decision, I know this is a unhealthy idea, but I couldn't help otherwise when I was faced with a thorny dilemma to choose between two options - to have or not to have my own children.
Ironically, thanks to one of the toxic mental and behavioral patterns that must have been in my family karma for generations and made me decide not to have my own children, I could put an end to this family karma. It was when this toxic pattern caused unbearable suffering to myself and people close to me. Then the suffering became totally unbearable, I started to wake up.
Since then I've been working on myself through the study of Chabad Hasidism and other non-Jewish teachings of nonduality. I seem to have got rid of many of the toxic mental and behavioral patterns that were in my family karma. Even if not, I'm at least fully aware of them when those toxic patterns that may still remain emerge.
Even after clearing my family karma to a large extent and even if I should have a "co-creator", I'm not interested to have my own children for a totally different reason now. What we perceive as human beings seem to me now as divine sparks from the same Source. Separateness and individuality are illusions. So I have no reason to stick to my own biological children. All of us as souls that borrow physical bodies are interconnected. I'd rather spend the rest of my life helping others who come in touch with me to understand and embrace this simple truth.