2022-08-26

How to Relate to People in a Total Dream State

The majority of human beings are in different degrees of a dream state in that we are identified with our (egoic) thoughts not only about other human beings and the world but also about ourselves. If someone is not only identified with their thoughts but also is unware of this fact, they are in a total dream state.

It's almost a miracle that I woke up from such a total dream state. I can't say yet that I've fully woken up as I still find from time to time how my egoic thoughts try to hijack me. But I can at least identify these attempts and am mostly successful to neutralize them. So unlike before I don't identify myself with this very thought in this blog entry.

A new, no less easy, challenge I've started to face is how to relate to people in a total dream state. The greatest difficulty with them is that I can't make them become aware of what they are unware of by verbal explanations. I encounter the same difficulty in other areas of the so-called unknown of the unknown.

I still wish every once in a while I could become a hermit in some secluded place, but ascetism is not part of Judaism and I can fully understand why - this way we'll deprive ourselves of one of the most precious opportunities for learning and growth.

This understanding doesn't always help me cope with those in a total dream state, especially when they verbalize their thoughts about me by confusing the "book" and the "story" with the "author" and labeling me accordingly. I've noticed that I encounter these people more and more frequently, which must mean that this is an important life challenge I have to cope with for my growth. But recently I've decided to stop trying to explain to them that they are in a total dream state as I've realized that this is totally futile, thus a waste of time.

What perplexes me is that though I'm aware that I'm the "author" (soul) and neither the "book" (body) nor the "story" (life), I'm still bothered by attempts by those in a total dream to label me according these two illusory equations. I'm not sure yet who in me is bothered, but the fact remains that I'm bothered.

I'm still hoping to meet some day at least one person who shares the same "language". One thing I already know for sure is that being frum is no guarantee. I've met so many frum people - probably the majority - who are in a total dream state.