Six Types of Reactions to My Fateful Decision to Leave Israel

In the past few weeks I've told about 50 people - mostly friends but also some acquaitances I bumped into on the street - about my fateful decision to leave Israel, hopefully not forever, in order to undertake some personal mission somewhere in the Diaspora. Once an academic, always an academic. I've identified the following six types of reactions so far:

1. Apathy
2. Judgmentalism
3. Advice
4. Superstition
5. Diplomacy
6. Empathy

These seem to reflect the levels - or to use a more neutral term, states - of consciousness of those who reacted. They are listed in the ascending order of the levels of consciousness. There is a huge, fundamental, gap between the first five and the sixth. They seem to come from the ego and the soul respectively. Of the 50 people I shared this decision with less than ten reacted empathically. Now let me elaborate upon each of these six types.

Those who reacted apathetically simply heard my decision and walked out saying little or nothing with no sign of emotion. I didn't take this reaction personally as they may be apathetic to most other people.

Judgmentalism in this specific contexts manifests itself as focusing on some grave "error" I made in their opinion and blaming me for it. Actually, those who reacted this way have repeatedly blamed me in the same manner. Fortunately, none of my friends reacted this way. Only a couple of acquaintances I bumped into on the street started blaming me again.

Giving advice when it's not requested is a very widespread reaction that is not restricted to this specific context. Those who give advice almost instinctively have only good intentions, which complicates the matter. In many cases those who can't help giving advice have never been in the same or similar situation, so their experience is very limited. They neither know nor care that I've already tried all the pieces of advice they gave and none of them worked.

Superstition means to try to encourage me by saying that everything will be alright. This is based on a naive and false idea about about life. Their superstition is based on the assumption that if we pray with all out heart, we'll get everything that our ego wants. But it's clear to anyone with enough life experiences that we don't always get what our ego wants, which is often to our ultimate benefit.

Diplomats are those who say seemingly nice words, but they take no action. For example, they say, "I'm sorry that you are leaving. Let's meet and talk before you leave." Do these people contact me? Never! I can alreasy identify diplomats quite easily.

Those who reacted empathically listened to what I had to tell them without interrupting me. They show true care though they may speak much less. After leaving academic, where rationality dominates, I've become highly intuitive. When I meet new people or even those I already know but haven't seem for a long time, I can immediately sense their spiritual vibe.

I've also identified a few common denominators among those reacted in one of the first five ways. I didn't disclose any details of my mission on purpose so that they might not start labeling me. Naturally, their first question with no exception was where I'm going. I wish I were wrong, but I'm quite convinced now after examining a sufficiently large sample of people that they have some instinctive urge to know about this mission of mine, including, first and foremost, its destination, to start labeling.

At the end of our short conversation all of them, again with no exception, wished me "success" on an autopilot. After receiving the same wishes several times I couldn't stand any more, and even asked some of them to wish me growth rather than "success". I also explained some of them who I prefer not be wished "success". This is because the biggest life challenge is said to keep "succeeding" because this way we'll never be able to learn humbleness. Besides, I'm quite sure that what most of them mean by "success" is to achieve what the ego wants.

Leaving Israel, But Hopefully Not Forever

I never imagined such a day would come. I have to leave Israel after Yom Kippur at the end of September in order to undertake some personal mission somewhere in the Diaspora. The temporary contract of this mission is for six and a half years until I reach the age of 67. I'd like to return to Israel then, but this contract may be prolonged.

For the past several months I tried everything imaginable to evade this, but I was left with no choice but to undertake this. So it chose me rather than the other way round.

I feel that I'm guided by some power that is far bigger than the force of my ego. When I tried to resist, nothing worked, but the moment I decided to flow with this power, everything flows so smoothly.

I also feel that in a sense my days are numbered here. But thanks to this feeling I'm discovering who and what are truly important to me. I have no time to lose for trifles.

I've never realized that Jerusalem is so dear to me. So I'm very sad that I have to leave it, at least temporally, hoping to return here eventually. But on the other hand, I already realize a huge potential for growing spiritually and making some contribution to society through what little wisdom I've acquired from my life experiences. So in overall terms my optimism and joy overshadow my sorrow.

When All Else "Fails"

"When all else fails...", Sonia Choquette, a renowned spiritual teacher I also admire greatly, continues in her book entitled Trust Your Vibes, "Pray".

Personally, I don't like the word "failure" as I strongly believe that there is no failure in life in the deepest sense of the word. But I understand what she means as I'm in such a situation, which I can characterize by paraphrasing "when all else fails" as "when nothing seems to work".

She elaborates "When all else fails... Pray" as follows:

"Sometimes we need to pray for a miracle. These are situations when you see absolutely no way forward and appearances point to a dead end."

"To pray for a miracle, you must have absolutely no ego resistance or interference. In other words, create an inner state of mind that completely surrenders the problem over to the Universe to resolve on your behalf and be 100 percent receptive to Divine intervention to successfully bringing about the desired outcome."

"It is also important that you pray with the understanding that if what you ask for goes against Divine Will and your soul plan, those will take priority over your request. Therefore, when praying for a miracle, it's important to include in your prayer that even though this is what you desire, if God has a better plan, thy will be done."

Of course, I totally agree with her, and this must be in tune with all the spiritual traditions and teachings. This is also the time when your faith and confidence are tested in a most fundamental way. Here is what Sonia Choquette continues to say:

"Pray with confidence that your prayer will be heard and answered in ways you do not have to figure out. Trust that you will be shown the answer one way. Pray, then let it go. You don't have to endlessly pray, plead, or beg. Pray with certainty that you are loved and that the Universe will give you the miracle you need. Then you just need to step aside and surrender your will to the Divine Will and allow it."

I don't see any sign so far, so if no miracle happens, I'll lose what I've come to understand as the second most precious thing in my life after life itself, which I seem to have to accept wholeheartedly, believing that this is also for the better.