Having left Israel two weeks ago, I arrived last week at the specific physical destination of some personal mission that chose me to accomplish somewhere in the Diaspora. Since then I've been keeping myself busy, buying the minimal stuff for my daily life, preparing all the necessary documents to apply for a visa in this country.
Unlike what I imagine as a new turbulent situation in Israel this location where I'm going to spend at least the next six and a half years is incredibly calm and clean. Since I can't start working, nor can I apply for any job there while waiting for the visa I applied for earlier this week, I've decided to enjoy this external serenity, which undoubtedly also contributes to my inner serenity.
Though I can't directly experience this wartime situation in Israel from afar, I feel I can see Israel, including its various myths more objectively, which those who live there may not be able to see so objectively as they live it, so are too emotionally involved to be objective.
One doubt that started to arise while I was still living in Jerusalem seems to be increasing as I've been exposed quite unexpectedly to new facts I had barely been aware of previously. I'm quite sure that if I had remained there in this special situation, I might not have experienced this change inside me.
At the same time I also feel quite sad that my new direct experiences here and discontinuation of my previous ones there seem to have affected me so easily in such a short period of time.