"Hero's Journey"

I left Jerusalem the day before yesterday and arrived at the destination of this personal mission of mine somewhere in the Diaspora yesterday.

I see some paralell between this "micro-mission" and the "macro-mission", which is the "descent" of our soul with a physical body in this world and composed of a series of "micro-missions". And I can see more clearly now one of the main purposes of this "macro-mission" through this parallel.

What I call here "micro-mission" is called "here's journey" by an American comarative mythologist named Joseph Campbell and often used by life coaches as a framework for their respective life coaching, including Finding Your Own North Star by Martha Beck and Claim Your Power by Mastin Kipp.

How this "micro-mission" that chose me (and not the other way round) perfectly matches the first stage of this "hero's journey". The life of the "hero" who used to live in his comfort zone reaches a crucial turning point. His external circumstances suddenly change significantly, and he is left with no other choice but to leave his comfort zone and go on a journey. This is exactly what has happened to me!

Please imagine the beginning of The Lord of the Kings, for example. Instead of reaching the goal of his journey easily he encounters (and conquers) a series of challenges.

I can already foresee that this "hero's journey" of mine won't be easy and I'll encounter a number of trials. But at the same time I can already foresee a huge potential for my growth by conquering them one after another with the help of some inner resource I myself wasn't aware of and/or some mentor I may encounter along the way.

PS: Wikipedia article in English on hero's journey

PPS: Excellent YouTube video clip by Leo Gura on hero's journey entitled The Highest Hero's Journey

Living and "Vacuum-Packing" the Now

As the date of my leaving Israel is approaching (next Wednesday!), thus my life in Jerusalem is coming to an end this time, I've been witnessing one fundamental change inside me. I've finally starting living the now. This is something I've studied extensively and understood at least conceptually but haven't been unable to fully implement in my daily life.

This is a strange but truly amazing feeling. Man is also called "human being" in English, but most human beings are actually human doings, that is, our being, which is our essence, has been hijacked by our doing.

Our doing and being can be compared to waves on the surface of the ocean and stillness below its surface. Living the now must also mean shifting our consciousness from that of waves from stillness. At least I now have this consciousness.

Once I've started living the now, I've also become keenly aware that the most precious thing I can give to others, especially when my time is very limited, is my presence in addition to my time. Giving my presence to others means, among others, actively listening to them without my agenda.

When I look around myself in such a state of consciousness, I realize anew that most people fail to live the now. I also realize that what prevent them from living the now are not only the fact that they've totally forgotten that they are human beings rather than human doings but also the fact that they are trapped in their own mind-made prison.

There are at least two symptoms of the mind-made prison in this specific context of failing to live the now. One is that you are hijacked by your regrets of the past and your worries about the future. The other is that your thoughts are on autopilot.

I've already witnessed this autopilot again and again every time I tell people that I've leaving Israel soon and undertake some mission somewhere in the Diaspora. Almost all of them wish me "success" at the end of our conversation. Of course, I know they only have good intentions. I tell some of those who may be able to understand me that Eckhart Tolle, my most favorite non-Jewish nondual master, teaches that the biggest challenge in life is to continue succeeding as you'll lose this way precious opportunities to learn humility. After this explanation I ask them to wish me growth rather than "success". They do so, but some of them wish me "success" automatically after wishing me growth instead of "success".

Living the now for the first time in life is such an amazing sensation! This experience also arouses in me amazing moment-to-moment feelings, which I've also started to "vacuum-pack", so to speak.

I made an experiment - and a successful one at that - of "vacuum-packing" the now, including its precious moment-to-moment feelings, when I participated in Jewish life coaching in a group of frum Jewish men in Jerusalem fro ten weeks from December 2017, when my divorce crisis started. I listened to one Jewish tune again and again - probably more than one thousand times - during and after the coaching sessions. When I listen to it, I vividly recall and can reexperience all the amazing feelings I experienced back then.

I'm making the same experiment these days, but consciously this time. I listen to one klezmer music tune used in an Ashkenazic folk dance workshop by my former dance teacher, Walter Zev Feldman, by converting this dance video to MP3. Here are the links to this video clip and one free only converter from YouTube to MP3:

• Skotshne
• YouTube to MP3 Converter

I'm also making another experiment to "vacuum-pack" the now by continuing to smell lavender, which someone has come to symbolize my life in Jerusalem, especially these days. Sense of smell is said to be the most spiritual of all the five senses. I can already foresee that every time I smell , I'll recall and reexperience all these amazing moment-to-moment feelings.

Inner Power Plant

One of the most important fruits of my having continued to study Chassidus in the past five years is that a kind of inner power plant seems to have been built inside me before I knew it. Thanks to this inner power plant, I've become less prone to negative energy.

Every society has some negative energy. The dominant negative energy I feel, for example, in Israeli and Japanese societies, includes egocentrism and resulting insensitivity, and fear of how others think of you and resulting depression respectively.

Until my last visit to Japan last late December and early January, I used to immediately absorb this negative energy in Japan and became depressed by the time I returned to Israel. I was overjoyed to realize that in this last visit I could return to Israel without absorbing this negativity.

Our natural state, or the essense of our soul, is joy. We can return to this state of joy just by removing the darkness that covers it. The sun is always shining even when it's cloudy.

It follows that what my inner power plant built automatically through my continued study of Chassidus is not to generate joy but to disperse the clouds that cover joy and prevent them from coming to me in the first place. The most prominent example of such clouds is negative thinking.

The teachings of Chassidus are characterized, among others, by ultimate positive thinking, for what lies as the foundation of these teachings is a belief that everything is good. There is affinity between this kind of belief and joy. One of the things that hide the fact that everything is good is our narrow-mindedness. Even by making the best use of our five senses and intellect we can perceive only a tiny part of the reality.

The fact that I noticed the existence of the above mentioned inenr power plant during my last visit to Japan has helped me to make a decision to leave Israel and undertake a mission somewhere in the diaspora. Without such an inner power plant I might have hesitated.

This power plant, like the other, conventional, power plants, needs to be continuously refueled and maitained. What I consider the most important fuel is my daily study of Chassidus. Of some hundred Chassidic books I've acquired in the past five years I can take or send only one tenth (cf. online list of these books). I'll continue studying these books in the destination of my mission.

What I consider no less important is to remain in touch with those friends of mine in Jerusalem whom have the same or similar spiritual vibe as mine. What is especially important to me is to continue learning the Book of Tanya, or the "written Torah of Chassidus", in khavruse with two close friends of mine separately once a week online.

Feeling the Power That Is Far Greater than the Force of My Ego

I had been struggling in vain to evade what had seemed back then the worst choice, until I decided about a month ago to surrender and accept what the power that is far greater than the force of my ego sent me.

Until then nothing worked, but since then everything has been working unbelievably smoothly as if the universe has my back. As a result I've also been experiencing for the first time such serenity I've never experienced so far in my entire life!

Naturally, it's emotionally very difficult for me to leave Jerusalem, but deep inside myself I already see a huge potential for my spiritual growth and social contribution to the destination of my mission. I've also become aware who is sending me there and why.

The enormous change I've been experiencing in the past one month, both externally and internally, must also mean that I've woken up from the illusion that I control my life and decided to trust and follow that power that is far greater than the force of my ego. I'm finally realizing my true nature - I'm not an independent wave delimited physically from other waves and with separate identities but nothing but part of the ocean!

What I've Come to Realize When I've Become Aware That My Days in Jerusalem Are Numbered

I feel that the less remaining days I have to live in Jerusalem, the keener my perception of reality becomes. What I used to perceive as black and white now looks full-colored.

One of the most important things that I've come to realize as a result is who and what are truly important to me and to whom I don't seem to be important enough. I have no time to waste for trifles and those who don't appreciate my time and presence, who are the most precious gifts I can give to those who are dear to me. For the first time in my life I'm becoming a "human being" rather than a "human doing".

I've also come to see so clearly the state of consciousness of those I know and even those I meet for the first time. When I meet them, I immediately sense their spiritual vibe. For this purpose conceptual knowledge about them only disturbs my perception. As Eckhart Tolle says, knowing about someone is one thing, and knowing them is another.

This leads me to realize more clearly than ever that most "human doings" are suffering from one collective sickness called the mind-made prison, which is caused by language. Many people have lost the ability to relate to reality without conceptualizing it with language in the form of labeling, whether they verbalize labels in speech or only in their thought.

On the one hand, this life challenge with all its implications including the above has made my relationship with certain people much closer than before, but on the other hand, I've realized that I have nothing in common with some of those whom I considered my friends.

Since I made this fateful decision to leave Jerusalem and decided to flow by following the mission that chose me, I've been learning a series of very important life lessons, some of which simply seem too much to digest. But I also feel that this is a true test in real life for all the teachings of Chabad Chassidus I've learned in the past five years, first formally at a special school in Jerusalem, then by myself.