The main reason for choosing the place where I've been living since then was initially an economic one - saving the rent by staying where I can stay for free. It didn't take me a long time to realize that this relocation also meant carrying out one important private task I can't do anywhere else in the world. I feel as if I were activating for the first time in life that part of the sould I had never activated. Accomplishing this task is probably more like my need than my desire.
Recently I've started feeling internal dissonance between this need and my growing desire to move to another place I've been thinking of for quite some time. I myself also feel the time hasn't come yet to do so, but I can't help feeling that I'm in a wrong place that isn't compatible with me both socioculturally and spiritually.
I want to believe that one professional task I've been carrying out is a meaningful one as a means of accomplishing my life mission. Theoretically, I can do it online living in another country, and actually, I do it online. But living in the same country as those I interact with seems to have a positive impact upon them, making them feel closer to me though it doesn't matter where you are physically located in your online interaction.
Recently it suddenly occurred to me to carry out this professonal task online not only with those who live in the country where I live now but also with those who live in the city I've been dreaming of moving to eventually after completing my private task.
I told this idea to a good friend of mine in Jerusalem, who has been encouraging me a lot and has a wide network of connections - both private and professional - in this city. He is ready to help me in this, too. We aren't sure yet if this will materialize, but the mere thought of this possibility has already filled my heart with such enormous joy.